My Heaven in Hell
by mywonderfulmuse
Summary: The gang has returned from Neverland and now Emma must choose who she wants to be with. Does she follow her heart or her head? My first multi-chapter fic. Give it a chance.
1. Chapter 1:Prologue

**Prologue:**

It had been nearly two weeks since their return from Neverland. Henry was safe and everyone had started getting their life's routine back in order. Things were returning back to normal. The only thing the fairytale residents of Storybrooke wanted was to forget and move on. Emma wanted the same, but she knew things couldn't go back to how it was before Neverland. And though trudging through that timeless jungle, fighting off Lost Boys, defeating Pan and rescuing her son had been like living in Hell on earth, a part of her never wanted to forget some of the events that took place there.

It was in Neverland where she nearly drowned; where her father had been poisoned and briefly lived on the brink of death. It was where her son had been kidnapped, threatened and had his heart pulled out of his chest, (literally). So much evil lived upon that Island and yet, Emma couldn't help but think about some of the good that came out of her journey there. She felt closer than ever to her parents, Mary Margaret and David. She even learnt to accept their alternate identities as Prince Charming and Snow White. She also embraced her own destiny as the saviour. She had started getting along with Regina because of their common goal to save Henry. Her son got a second chance to be with his father. And although Neal being alive was a shock and somewhat upsetting for her to deal with, Emma knew it was a blessing to have him back.

The only downfall to Neal's return was the expectation everyone now had that the two of them would get back together, no questions asked. Everyone, from Neal to Henry to her parents figured things would return to how they were twelve years ago when he abandoned her in prison and she was forced to give up her one and only child. To say she had unresolved feelings about the whole situation would be the understatement of the century.

Mary Margaret and David went on and on about Emma, Neal and Henry finally being able to start fresh and be a happy family. Mary Margaret pushes Emma everyday towards Neal and tells her she deserves her happy-ending more than anyone. The only thing they don't think about is the fact that Neal may not be her happy-ending as they all suspect he is. First and foremost, being with Henry, no matter how complicated his family situation, is her idea of a happy-ending. But if she were to imagine her life with someone else in the picture—a partner in life—Neal isn't always the face that comes to mind.

Emma often thinks about another good that came from Neverland. Without their adventures there, she never would have gotten to know the man Hook can be. He changed in Neverland, for her. It is something she could never forget. Without Hook, they never would have stood a chance in rescuing Henry. Emma saw how sweet, caring, brave and trusting Hook is. In Neverland, he became the man she hoped he would, the man she could confide in, the man she needed, and in result, the man she ultimately wanted.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1:**

She hadn't seen him for two weeks. Not since the welcome home party at Granny's where he barely said one full sentence to her. Since then, she had tried to seek him out but she could never seem to find him. She didn't understand why Hook was avoiding her. Emma remembered the day they all returned from Neverland on the Jolly Roger. The last time she and Hook had an actual conversation.

_"__Can I talk to you," She asked Hook as everyone got of the ship to greet the others. Emma pulled him aside, toward the helm. _

_"__I just wanted to thank you for everything you did. I know that without you, we never would have had a chance at getting Henry back." He seemed breathless and a bit stunned for a few seconds before he responded. _

_"__No problem, Lass," he broke his eye contact with her. "I realize that Henry probably wouldn't have even been taken in the first place if I hadn't run off with the bean. So I owed it to you."_

_"__You didn't have to come back with the bean but you choose to. That says more than you think. And we both know you helping to get Henry back was more than you repaying a debt you thought you owed. You're a better man than you give yourself credit for Hook." Emma took a deep breath, looked straight at him and smiled genuinely. "The last few weeks have made me realize what kind of man you really are,"_

_"__A one-handed pirate with a drinking problem?" he asked, half-jokingly._

_"__No. A man with honour. And a man I've learnt to trust, besides my better judgement." He scoffed at her. "So what are you saying Swan?"_

_"__I'm saying that I want—"_

_"__Hey there you are. I was wondering where you went off to." Neal came jogging up onto the deck of the Jolly Roger. "Everybody is waiting to see you. We're all going to Granny's for some drinks to celebrate making it back." Neal looked between Emma and Hook, who were completely bewildered. He hated that Emma was talking with Hook and he knew he had to interrupt them as soon as he saw them alone together._

_Neal looked at Hook with suspicion and jealousy but he bit back what he really wanted to say and decided to go with a more adult approach to talking to Hook—for Emma's sake. Neal didn't want Emma to think he was petty or possessive when it came to her. So instead of telling Hook to bluntly get lost, he thanked him._

_"__Look man, I wanted to say thanks for helping us get back here and for the part you played in saving my son." Neal stuck his hand out and the Pirate shook it." Are you staying in Storybrooke for a few days before sailing off on your next adventure?" he asked._

_Neal didn't miss the way the pirate's eyes slid to Emma before he answered. "Yeah, I think I'll stay at least another couple of days. I'd like to learn what this town is all about." Emma sighed an inaudible breath of relief. _

_Neal didn't seem overly enthused about Hook's response but he smiled brightly, and then wrapped his arm around Emma's shoulder. "Well that's good to hear. Emma we should go. Henry is probably waiting for us."_

_Before walking away, Emma looked back at Hook and gave a small smile. He winked back at her and smirked. He joined them about an hour later at Granny's but he didn't talk with her; at least not alone. Only if they were in a group and she asked him a question, would he then give her a vague response. There were no innuendos, no flirting or even their usual bickering for the entire night. She had no idea what she did wrong for him to lose interest so fast. _

"Mom, are you burning the pancakes again?" Henry yelled from the other room, taking her attention away from her thoughts. She looked down at the skillet in front of her and noticed the thin smoke coming up from under the pancakes.

"Oh, shit!" she exclaimed, turning off the skillet then turning on the fan above the oven. She was so entranced in her thoughts of Hook she completely forgot what she was in the middle of doing.

She took the spatula and lifted a pancake up, looking at the blackened bottom.

"Maybe we should just go to Granny's for breakfast," Henry said as he walked into the kitchen.

"Sorry kid, I guess I got a bit distracted," Emma apologized.

On the way to Granny's, Henry didn't stop talking about how excited he was to go back to school and tell everyone about his adventure in Neverland and about his two heroic moms who saved him and all the Lost Boys. Emma had started to just nod her head and stop paying attention before he asked her a question that stopped her in her tracks.

"So, when are you and dad getting back together?" Henry said with a huge smile and gleeful tone.

Neal. Emma hadn't really given much thought about him in days. They'd seen each other of course, but only in passing. Brushing pass one another at the diner or dropping Henry off. They've said hello and given an awkward wave but they haven't had a real conversation since their return to Storybrooke. Emma had been too busy and too confused about her feelings for Neal to even think about what the two of them were, let alone talk to him about it.

"He asks about you all the time and wants to see you more but he thinks you're avoiding him," Henry said, after she didn't answer his first question.

"Henry," Emma took on the tired tone you get when trying to explain something difficult to a child. "Things between me and Neal are complicated." Emma held open the door to Granny's diner and she and Henry went in and sat at a booth.

"We have a lot of history together, not all of it is good. It's not something we can just work through in a matter of a few weeks." She told him. "But you still love him don't you?" Henry asked seriously.

Before Emma got a chance to respond, Ruby came to the booth to take their orders and Emma sighed a breath of relief at the interruption.

"Good morning Emma, good morning Henry. What can I get for you two?" Ruby asked in a voice far more jolly and upbeat than Emma was feeling at the moment.

Emma ordered her usual morning coffee with toast, bacon and eggs while Henry got his hot chocolate with cinnamon and pancakes. When Ruby brought them their breakfast she turned to Emma and grinned.

"Guess who was in here early this morning asking about you."

Ruby was such a gossip. She knew everything about everyone's business. She knew who was fighting with whom; who was screwing who; which marriages and relationships were falling apart and why. She even knew some people's annual income. She says it's because people like to talk to her as if she were the local barber but the truth is, when you have hyper-sensitive wolf hearing, you pick up a few things in people's conversations. Either way, when she heard something juicy she could never keep it in. Emma didn't mind. As town sheriff, some of the things Ruby heard were useful in knowing what was happening around Storybrooke.

When Emma shook her head and shrugged Ruby continued. "Captain Sexy," she exclaimed with a saucy grin. "He wanted to know where he could find you today. I also heard him ask Granny about potential jobs he could look at. I guess he's thinking about staying awhile—now I wonder what could possibly keep him here in this little ol' town," she added with a wink.

"What's she talking about," Henry asked.

"Captain Hook's got a thing for your mom." Ruby looked pleased with herself for knowing this information, but all it got her from Emma was an angry glare. "I'm just gonna go and check on…something…over here."

"Who cares if he has a thing for you? Why wouldn't he? You're the coolest mom ever," Henry exclaimed. "But as long as he knows that you don't like him back and that you're already taken than there's no problem right?"

Emma didn't know what to say to Henry. The last thing she wanted was to break his heart by telling him she wasn't actually taken and she did actually have feelings for the pirate. Maybe she was giving up on Henry's dream of being a family too easily. Hook had been avoiding her for weeks and just because he asks about her, doesn't mean he wants to be with her. If he did, he'd be fighting a lot harder for her. Perhaps she needed to give things with Neal another try. She didn't want to start anything too serious too fast. But maybe they needed a trial date before she decides what she wants.

As if on cue, the bell at the door dinged and Emma looked up to see Neal walking through.


End file.
